Let there be light........

For rants.

2009-07-12T05:01:29Z

I have moved my rants to another blog. Follow the link!

http://thephilippicaffliction.blogspot.com

Unwarranted Revenge

2009-07-09T11:05:46Z

My dog has been unwell for the last few days and it resulted in 4am cleanup on my behalf. Since I am currently living with my grandmother this had to be done with the up most stealth to stop her and the other dogs from waking up and alerting everyone in the neighbourhood. Especially when you're running around in nothing but a t-shirt. So I grabbed the cleaners, towels and bag and for the next twenty minutes I was scrubbing the new carpet. By the end of it I put everything into a plastic bag and tied it up tightly.

Then I was struck dumb.

I now had a bag of dog vomit and shit and no where to put it. I first thought of the bin outside. No, that wouldn't do. The dogs were out that way and the last thing I needed was them trying to get inside. I didn't want to leave it inside, my grandmother would be up hours before me, and the last thing I wanted was to hear another lecture. Then it occurred to me to leave in on the front doorstep. She never went out there and when I would wake up I could slip into the bin without anyone the wiser. Yes! Fantastic idea no?

My grandmother brought me a cup of tea at 11am that day. Opening my curtains in attempt to wake me up. For a few seconds she was silent and then she rounded on me. "You wouldn't believe what those damned kids did!" Her voice lifted a few octaves. "Bloody toe-rags the whole lot of them."
"Mmm what?" I forced my eyes open.
"They left me a bag of dog crap on my front porch!"
I was truly awake by then. "Oh-Um"
"So I threw it back over the fence, that will teach the little shits."
Apparently she let Boris out that way that morning because she was feeding the cats out in the kitchen. I told her who had left the bag on the front doorstep and for the next day we peered out of our windows wondering if the neighbours had noticed anything. So far they haven't.

Murp

2009-05-31T10:59:10Z

WARNING! In many ways the body is designed only for survival with suitable functions for the following work: Eating, sleeping and fornicating. Failure to acknowledge such functions may result in hunger, realisation and/or self service. Stay alert, watch what you are doing and use common sense where applicable. Resist functions while you are tired or under the influence of drugs, alcohol or medication. A moment of inattention while in public may result in serious personal injury. Dress properly. Do not wear out of date clothing or jewellery. Keep your hair and clothing clean at all times. Do not overreach. Keep proper formalities and respect others opinions. This enables better control of dignity in unexpected situations. Keep greetings short and clean. Check for misunderstandings or subtle insults in conversation that may effect social manipulation. If damaged, have the speech repaired before further contact with others. Many accidents are caused by poorly maintained conversations. Negligence will result with eating, sleeping and fornicating while rendering civilisation obsolete.

Here We Go Again

2009-04-28T11:52:01Z

I'm back. This time I have made a resolution to stick to Live Journal for more than a week. This (for me at least) is a hard thing to contemplate. Nevertheless for now I am back and with news. For those of you who haven't heard, Dan and I have split up. A mutual decision on both parties and from what it seems we are both the happier for it. So five years has come and gone and I can say without a doubt that I have no regrets to what Dan and I have done.

Meanwhile, my trip to America is back on. Still in the early stages of planning I am mainly still looking at pretty pictures of New York. My main focus will be on New England and good ol' Texas, but there will be plenty of stops between the states. But before I can reach America I have to finish my degree. School is going well enough, I am still interested in my subjects so something must be sinking in.

The Horror

2007-10-30T01:05:25Z

It has been awhile, I admit that.
Currently Im working for a hotel, and might I add it is full of australians. The hours are crappy and the pay is shit, but oh well, such as life hmm?
Ive had plenty of time to think lately, after a bad spell I had to push through I finally found some goals. Everyone who knows me realizes Im as flighty as it comes when it comes to, well, anything. But Next year I plan to work and go to the states for a holiday, then as we move to wellington, and if Im still full of conviction I will apply to Uni and start my english degree. Since Im constantly writing anyway, and looking at the papers, I think I'll rather enjoy it.
I've sorted alot out with my family which is good, my father and I now understand each other and pulling it together just a little bit more. I got up the courage to tell my nana about the english degree and Ive never seen her so excited.
Dans been so great through all my spells, good or bad, I do feel sorry for him sometimes. Love you babe.

As usual thats all I have to say,
Rock On!

What stupid people say....

2007-03-25T11:37:13Z

For the last seven years, most of you will know that I have been working in the hospitality industry.
Here are 5 good soild reasons why the consumer populice should be lined against the wall and shot!

1: A big man walks in, eats a meal that could probally feed two or three. Then he asks for a diet coke.

2: A consumer says. " I am on a diet, so I think I will have the hot chocolate. "

3: A consumer says. " Your ham steak. Is is Pork? "

4: A consumer says. " Is the scotch fillet grilled or deep fried. "

5: A consumer says. " That crumbed fish you have. Can I have it battered. "

If you are one of these people, I will hunt you down like the dog you are.

W00t!

2006-11-29T10:28:49Z

The Mighty Levin

2006-07-29T11:55:48Z

Well the move is over.
Advantages: Having my own space once again, seeing my nephew, talking to my nana, getting money
Disadvantages: I miss Dan...A whole bunch, he's not here to make me laugh, I dont have somebody who I can truely talk too ethier. I know I know girly mush but it is true.
Anyway....Back to the lovely entertianment of trying to figure out what music I actually have.

YES!!! It is I!

2006-04-14T09:04:50Z

Well its been awhile...

I have the plague the flat cold has finally caught me and I am in a state of moping around feeling sorry for myself. Work on the other hand is boring me to tears, but thats alright. I have throughly enjoyed having time off to myself, doing whatever I want and not being bugged at home during the day. After seven years of working in a hell hole I feel I have deserved this break. In semester two, I want to do a half year performing arts course, just for the random fun, I also feel that it will build my self confindence and help me not be too shy around people.
I also feel quite relaxed these days. YAY me, my gym is openning soon, so I can "PUMP SOME IRON" Whoop!..
I still love Dan, nothings changed there and Im also looking for new hobbies i.e Archery and Folk Dancing, Why? BECAUSE I CAN......and by the by, theres nothing wrong with Jane Austin. ^_^

Le Sigh

2006-02-16T05:23:50Z

Well after all said and done, adam has removed me off his friends list...and I have no idea why * Le Sigh * Whats a scolding between friends...oh well, thats just life I guess..

MORTAL!!!

2006-02-11T13:42:04Z

.:Heroic Mortal:.

A mortal in a world of gods and monsters, you are

one of Creation's truest heroes: you have no

special powers and no powerful entities to

aid you, and yet you have the bravery to face

the world and make your mark upon it.

Which kind of Exalted character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

I dont need any special powers to rock....Im just awesome!

Well............

2006-02-04T12:13:43Z

I May be moving back to the mighty smoke called LEVIN again, I may have a job in the market gardens which will be awesome! but I would have to move there anyway seeing my nana has dupitrins (however they are spelt) and is getting her hands cut open, seeing how I'm the only one that can stay with her at night, it falls on to me. not that I mind. I like the space.
We have James and Mark arriving tomorrow, the place looks like a bomb hit it, and I still have to put a BBQ together, so tomorrow looks rather busy!
Exalted is rocking like a nuns nipples at the moment..though we dont get to play for like a Week!..* Le sigh *
Currently I am working with my father painting a huge farm house! The sun it BURNS! and we are going to spray a shed at some point for free booze and honey. what more could I want?!
Anyway, tired now...Bye bye

Its my birthday, and I can do..........something

2006-01-07T12:39:46Z

Well here it is finally and officially, my 21st birthday.
The party went very well, even if I drunk myself sober by the end of the night, Dan, bless his little cotton softs baked me my very first Birthday cake. Thank you to all that showed up, you guys really made the party and I can safely say...that was the coolest birthday song. EVER.
Well it's late..but I will try to post more...Night All

Fucking, fuck, fucking FUCK fuck FUUCCK!

2005-12-10T11:13:57Z

I hate everything! I hate my computer! I hate palmerston, I hate the fat cat next door...Why does everything happen to me! It doesnt help Im extremely stressed about EVERYTHING! I dont have any time for anyone, and I cant even be alone when im at home...Im too crowded, too angry, and over OVER stressed......fuck you EVERTHING.

Where to start...

2005-11-15T10:18:53Z

Oh yes,
I have finished the draft for my first assignment for massey today...you know, its not as hard as it looks.
Well heres a little story..I was driving to work today, quietly humming a tune to The Labyrith, when some total dick-weed, goes in to a corner in front of me. I braked of course and stopped two inches away, thing was, another car was coming out of the side street as well, so if I hit him, he would be sandwiched between the two of us. Well I beeped my horn, and pulled the fingers, swearing and cursing like a bitchy old grandmother. And did you know what he did? He did the fingers right back at me.
I mean WTF!!
I had every intention of following that jackass, and slamming him in to a power pole, but no I was bigger than him and drove away. ( Besides I have no insurance) But really....What a absolute cunt!

I have also resigned from Kingsgate once again. YAY and am now job hunting.
But overall, its been a good week!

Reminder

2005-11-09T05:01:09Z

Don't forget that Serenity is starting tomorrow, at 8.30. Those who purchased movie tickets will be going to see this very show, so meet up with us at Mage, and we'll go along thereafter.

This has been a public service announcement.

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

2005-10-10T10:01:45Z

Okay where to start.

I am now thoroughly addicted to comics thanks to Heroes. My usual day starts out very well; my will is SURPREME about not spending money...then two hours later I've cleared off a shelf and it’s sitting in my bag ready to be paid for...* Le Sigh * Guaranteed I would have spent my pay packet three weeks in advance before I even have my coffee break. It’s a cruel twisted world.

BAD NEWS! I have to work at shitty ol' kingsgate again...*sigh* I need the money though, so with sacrifice comes great rewards. (Or so I am taught)
GOOD NEWS! Next year I will be starting my Animal Sciences Degree extramurally, I’m only going to be doing three papers and summer school, but it gets those boring subjects out the way when I return FULLTIME!

And now we come to Dan. Double D as he calls himself. (Diabetes Dan) Well it just goes to show that when I was looking for a stallion with pheromones to break steel balls. I managed to find myself this genetic defect. Will I ever get things right! *Grins* But on the serious side, I am quite worried about him, as I have seen diabetes in action it’s not a pretty picture. I know it’s going to be hard on him, especially when it comes time to diet and exercise. It is really not something like a diet where you can say “Well I can do it just this once “as you scoop a tiny chip dripping in onion dip. Because if you do that…well you are all kinds of fucked up. Any case I have great confidence in him, and he knows that I will be here for him and how much I love him.

Enough with the mushiness I am going to bed!

AWAY WITH YOU FILTHY READERS….AWAY!

GAARRRHHHHHHHH

2005-09-14T10:59:52Z

So is it me? I am so angry with so many things its driving me INSANE!
I don’t know why people like to wind me up but they do it, and I bite back. I guess it’s because Imp under allot of stress at the moment. I feel like a failure at everything I do, and I seem to have this certain knack of loosing everything I enjoy. It’s just not fair!
My life sucks, all it’s taught me is that I will never amount to anything, and everything good in my life I will get shit three times forth.
I try to look on the bright side of life, but under the circumstances, well.......

I thought Palmy would get me out of this rut I am in, but it just seems to make it worse. But I think that’s just me missing my family and friends in Levin. Life is just not fair, I work hard and I get nothing in return, apart from paying the bills. I just wish I could have a break, not being me for a day would be awesome! I guess some of the problem is that I am not happy with myself in any way shape or form. I need a hair cut, and clothes that actually fit me, its amazing for me, how a little appearance can go along way. I know it’s pretty shallow, but before I can feel good about myself, I have to at least have the appearance of feeling good about myself.

Anyway enough with my whinging, I have officially started at Heroes, I get to look at geek stuff all day long what more could I possibly want. Dan is buried under a ton of homework, so we spend very little time together at the moment. Which leaves me to contemplate my meaningless existence. I guess it would be alright if I had a damn hobby, wargaming just..meh at the moment, reading? nothing has interested me for a while now and I can’t be bothered. Dan is currently doing snow angels on the bed to prove his undying love for me this very instant, as for me I’m going to bed!

Goodnight everybody, Good luck.

I NEVER LEARNT TO READ!

2005-09-05T10:00:25Z

Apart from super-gluing my eyebrow, and throwing my dinner on the floor like a retard, this week has been AWESOME!!
MC took me to a beauticians, where I had my eyebrows and eyelash's dyed, from there we pooled what little money we had together and got ourselves Burger King....mmmmmmmmm food.

Dans Birthday is this Thursday....awwwww my baby is growing up! He will be a MIGHTY 26 (the cradle snatcher) I managed to get my job at Heroes in the nick of time, and got him some very cool pressies. I also got him some BRIGHT pink socks covered in red polka-dots!

Anyway..Im so very tired...

Nights.

TOM JONES!!

2005-08-26T10:54:21Z

http://rumandmonkey.com/widgets/tests/apocalypse/

Anyway, this week has been an alright week. I had a good role-play session, started my new job, had lunch with MC and yeah things are going okay.
Currently Im working a 52hr week plus school when I can, I also have to figure out finances due to xmas and going to Hamilton so it is going to be full on from here on in.
Anyway, time to write my resignation for my old job.

Jelly!!

2005-08-22T03:13:02Z

Thanks to The_Simon and Mellific I devoured jelly over the last few days....with the help on Dan of course.
The_Simon and Mellific, knowing I was quite down in the dumps made me a delicious traffic light jelly, suger free as well, and it was AWESOME.
It certianly cheered me up alot.

THANKS GUYS! YOUR THE BEST

Another Day

2005-08-20T12:55:16Z

Well for the last few days, I've been pretty down about everything. This is normal for me for I have unfortunately bad manic depression.
If you have ever suffered depression then you will know how much of a bastard it really is. I've been finding it hard recently to relax and talk to my friends, its also been very hard to get out of bed. Like today for instance, I spent roughly 13 hours in bed, with nothing but these horrible thoughts floating about in my head.
I have very little self confidence if any, and no pride left about myself. I feel sorry for Dan to have to put up with it and help me deal with it, especially at 3 O'clock in the morning. He has been my guardian angel since I moved out of my comfort zone and im not sure how much he realises that just being there for me is helping dramatically.
It's quite weird how the littlest comment can set me off, or how some slight offensive comment can end up in my mind. " NO ONE LIKES ME, I MIGHT AS WELL GO EAT WORMS " and " I SUCK, I CANT DO ANYTHING RIGHT! " I guess all I can really do is laugh at myself afterwards and say. " Yup. I may over react just a little bit " :)
So today I start setting myself goals like:

A) Loose some weight,
B) Dont let people talk over me,
C) Dont let people walk over me,
D) Dont be afraid to think what other people think of me, etc, etc,

Even though I know its going to be a very long time before I learn to balance myself, I'm just greatful for the friends I do have that stick beside me no matter what.

Cheers Guys, and Thanks.

NARGH

2005-07-25T01:14:11Z

Well, I finally hit the stage where I need to leave this course. I've decided its not for me and it is wasting my time. So from this day forth its job hunting yaaay!

I dont know

2005-07-19T01:38:57Z

Okay, does anyone know what to do with eft pos recipts that you get when the lines are down, you know how they do it all manually and stuff?

The truth is out there.....

2005-07-18T13:17:43Z

Well its time to be honest with myself, Im homesick, and all I can think about is going home. I've lived in palmy a mighty five months and I really havent found anything I like about it, except for those few people that makes getting out of bed in the morning worth it.
I've found I've been unfair with alot of people. Im a shy person, most people who meet me know that, but I feel i've been unfair for not letting some very great people get close to me. As Dan has pointed out I seem to close myself off, and hardly ever talk to anyone.
I've done some soul searching and found that it might be caused by the fact that most of my friendships became shit, infact most cases were that my so called "friends" used me for all I was worth.

I have been breaking down quite alot lately which hasnt helped with the homesickness, even though Dan is here for me, I feel that certain loneliness that comes of -thinking- I have no friends. I know this sounds like a soap opera covered in cheese, but putting it down is making me feel better :P Anyway why I think I have no friends? I have no idea, I do know however most of it is because I don't give my trust to hardly anyone.

But im trying as hard as I can to learn to trust again, and im also trying to find a new hobby to keep my mind busy so it doesnt sink into Levin paranoia again. :D

Anyway Im tired! NIGHTS!